You'll Ruin Your Breakfast

Remember when we were little, and your mom would never let you have a snack after about 3:00PM? And then you'd whine and ask why, and she'd tell you that you were going to ruin your dinner? Where the hell was my mom at 2:00AM, in my cab, in the drive-thru of my favorite fast-food Mexican place last night? Someone (namely my mother) should have been there to let me know that meal was going to ruin my breakfast. My delicious, sesame bagel, whipped cream cheese, assorted fruit, mimosa breakfast. It's almost 9:00AM and I'm still full. Damn it.

Suspicious

Two dudes just came into my office to "check the fire dampers." Okay, I used to work for a homebuilder, and to me, fire dampers go in fire places. I work on the 17th floor of a fancy corporate building. No fireplace, obviously (although that would be super sweet in the winter). So I think those dudes were casing the joint to see if we had anything to steal. If the Cholula hot sauce isn't in my desk tomorrow when I get in, I will know who took it.

I got an award!!! Neener neener neener!

My good friend, who I've never actually met, but will someday, Sassypants, gave me an award! I'm super special.

Here are the rules for the Over The Top Award:

USE ONLY ONE WORD! It’s not as easy as you might think. Copy and change the answers to suit yourself and pass it on. It’s really hard to use only one-word answers so try your best. (Um...okay, I'm going to use one word, but I also need commentary.)
Tag 6 other bloggers and let them know that you think they are 'Over the Top'! (And this is sad, but I don't have 6 other blogger friends. So I'm going to be a selfish, stingy bitch and keep this award all to myself. Ha!)



1. Where is your cell phone? dunno (I should probably go find it, now that you bring it up.)
2.Your hair? up (Because it was freakin' hot today.)
3. Your mother? silly
4. Your father? Oregon
5. Your favorite food? Mexican (I was Mexican in a former life. I'm pretty sure.)
6. Your dream last night? none
7. Your favorite drink? beer (Mmmm...makes me want one now.)
8. Your dream/goal? curator
9. What room are you in? office
10. Your hobby? reading (Not the "for school" kind, but the "for fun" kind, although I'm not sure I remember what that's like.)
11. Your fear? sharks (Dear Jesus I hate sharks!)
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? USC (it's one word!)
13. Where were you last night? work
14. Something that you aren’t? boring (It might be good, it might be bad...)
15. Muffins? cranberry (Oh, Jimmy's Cafe cranberry muffins, I love you so.)
16. Wish list item? goat (His name will be Quincy and he'll sleep in my room on a dog bed. It could happen, you don't know.)
17. Where did you grow up? MV
18. Last thing you did? Angels (There will be a game 5! While I'm in Vegas! Whoop! Whoop!)
19. What are you wearing? jeans
20. Your TV? big
21. Your pets? feathery
22. Friends? fabulous
23. Your life? hectic
24. Your mood? excited (The Angels won and I'm off to Vegas tomorrow bright and early! I am desperately in need of being drunk for 40 hours straight.)
25. Missing someone? yup
26. Vehicle? hybrid
27. Something you’re not wearing? hat
28. Your favorite store? Target
29. Your favorite color? pink
30. When was the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? Tuesday (I had a minor breakdown over the GRE, but I'm better now.)
32. Your best friend? Shannie
33. One place that I go to over and over? school
34. One person who emails me regularly? Mom
35. Favorite place to eat? Campos (Oh, Señor Campos....mmmmmmmm.)

Ha ha ha!

For those of you who don't know, Google Analytics is a free dealio that will tell you keyword search terms that led people to your blog. I'm sure it has an actual function, but I just think it's funny. I just checked it, and someone was directed to my blog with this:

"can I fall asleep after Botox"

Um...I don't know, can you? Does Botox cause insomnia? Because that could be a deal breaker for me.

And at your funeral, I will sing the requiem....

This weekend, I went to the funeral of the wife of a good friend of Steve's. It was totally sad, but it was one of those services where everyone truly did (try to, at least) celebrate her life, rather than mourn her death. And whenever I go to a funeral, I think, "I really hope I can touch so many people, so that they want to come to celebrate my life." Which led me to consider how I would want my funeral to be handled. My twin thinks this is morbid, but can't I lay it out, at least? I'm not saying it's imminent, but someday we are all going to die, and I can't have my funeral f***ed up because I didn't specifiy how it should go down.

1. Everyone wears pink, even the boys. It's my favorite color, and none of this all in black crap.

2. Nobody goes up there and mentions God, not even my mother. I know, I know, ideally she won't be at my funeral, but I need to put it in there. Keep your personal beliefs personal; this is my party, and I don't go the God thing.

3. I don't want it at a cemetery; I don't want to be buried at a cemetery, so they probably won't let you have it there anyway. And obviously not in a church. Maybe there will be a space in a temple that I attend at the time.

4. There will be Mexican food. Not from some crummy caterer, but from the BOMB place, wherever that is at the time.

5. There will be booze. Obviously. When I go out, I want everyone to party and celebrate. Less crying, more tequila shooters. (You'll have to move this out of the temple space...)

6. DO NOT let those crappy funeral home people sing, PUH-LEASE! I would like "I Remember You" by Skid Row to play. It will be the only funeral ever with Skid Row, which will rock.

7. I wish to be cremated (which probably should have been number one) and buried on the beach of the Chewuch River in Winthrop, WA. It's my happy place, and I want to remain there for all eternity.

8. This should probably be combined with number one, but no one has to dress up. I hate to dress up, especially when I feel crappy, so I think that's a tradition that needs to go.

9. Do not send flowers. I can't use them now; donate to a charity in my name, preferably one involving wildlife, but I will let you pick.

I think that's it. I kept it under 10, which I think was nice of me. :)

Oui Oui

My super brave friend Mallory has recently moved to Lyon, France to study abroad for one semester. While she's there, she'll be blogging, and I highly recommend reading about her adventures, here: http://malloryisfrench.blogspot.com/. She is currently my hero, because I like to pretend that I don't study abroad because I'm married and can't leave my hubby and pets, but the truth is that I don't know if I'd be brave enough to do it. So I'm living vicariously through Mallory's adventures.

Three reasons everyone should be jealous of me

1. On Friday, my husband emailed me his own Honey Do list. Ha ha! I didn't even have to write it. (And it included washing my car.)

2. Yesterday, while I spent the entire day at the library writing a paper because they have air conditioning and we don't, he did all my laundry.

3. This morning, he went to Denny's to pick up breakfast because that's what I felt like.

I'm a very lucky girl. :)